Pass the Peas Please

I'm not sure when it happened, but eating out with a baby has become more of an olympic sporting event than a meal as far as I'm concerned.... that combined with a game of "Beat the Clock!"  Granted, I do have a bit of an advantage since as a teacher you are trained to eat in 15 minutes or less- I still feel like I deserve a medal after my efforts taking a baby into an eating establishment by myself!

I was just talking with a friend today about the whole process (after we had just done it ourselves!) and her words pretty much pegged it. "Afterwards you think, did I enjoy my food/meal/dining experience... um I can't even remember!"

Eating out pre-baby:
1. Get a table
2. Order food
3. Talk & Savor meal with chosen company
4. Pay
5. Leave feeling great that you didn't have to clean up any dishes!

Eating out post-baby (over newborn sleep all day age):
1. Get a table
     a. table must be child friendly and avoid hitting passersby with baby gear if seat is too far out in the aisle
     b. strap baby into seat and assemble toys to entertain child until you can get food out (or discover there
         are no straps on the seat given to you and repeat process) :)
     c. simultaneously keep child from pulling on mini blinds on the window
2. Order food
    a. try to figure out what you want while pulling out snacks for baby, rearranging items on table so they are
        out of baby's reach, and discovering that jr. has a poopy diaper
    b. try to finesse waiter with cool tricks your baby can do seeing as how he/she will probably be leaving the
        table in disarray, though you try your best to minimize collateral damage :)
    c. order food and 50 extra napkins too
3. Talk & Savor meal with chosen company
    --- this just makes me laugh! I am good if I can remember the story I am trying to tell! It will take me the whole meal to finish one thought most likely.  Continue multitasking.... ---
4. Pay
    a. If you have made it this far you have also made it through every scrap of food you have brought for
        baby in the diaper bag and he/she is politely letting you know the highchair is getting boring
    b. Attempt to do math to figure out tip and such (again I have not mastered the multitasking, clearly!) :)
5. Leave feeling great that you didn't have to clean up any dishes!
    a. Still feel good about this, but you are also feeling slightly guilty about the amount of smashed
        food particles under your child's seat, as well as the pile of wipes, napkins, etc.

Then if you are really lucky (again speaking from recent personal experience)...
Little one may let you see their lunch all over again on the way home.  Not a fan of peas the second time around... :)